Ironic, Just Plain IRONIC

Guess what? I took my Home-Nursing exam... Made a few committees laughed... that's a good thing, right?

what really happened was that I was suppose to throw the used cotton wool into one, take note, just one gallipot (A small pot... around the size of a Chinese tea cup... a bit larger... and made of metal). But, because I was nervous, I threw the first cotton wool into one gallipot, and the second one into another gallipot. That makes it two gallipots.

Shock!

I realized my mistake! OMG! My eyes widen, the committees looked at me. I did an act too fast to be thought through-- I used my bare hands to remove the cotton wool from one gallipot and throw it into another one... so now there's one empty gallipot and one containing cotton wool.

They laughed... I did too...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nothing Ironic yet, you say?

well, just keep reading....

let's see....
Saturday, Home-Nursing exam...
Saturday night, high fever...
Sunday, extreme head-ache, high fever, whole body ache

see the connection? First, I went for the exam to test my knowledge on treating sick patient. Then later,I became the sick patient and needed someone else to treat me... Ironic

sick... with terrible head-ache... couldn't study... it was torture!!! But I told myself that I have to finish my homework...

so, i did my homework and suffer the occasional jerking of nerve in my head... Painful... Agony...

I feel so lost... Final exam are coming.. I'm not prepared... So insecure... so unconfident... so sick... so scared... so-so crushed....

oh yeah, the only reason I'm able to be typing here is because my headache has ceased... and how? Obviously, I took medicine... he he...

let me tell you, swallowing pills isn't easy! Especially those big ones. Jeez... it's about one cm measured from the middle... (sorry i don't know how they use to measure a circle) but it's big, trust me...

it got stuck half way down my throat sometimes... once, it got caught at the back of my tongue, and couldn't swallow it, so i had to -i dunno how i did it- push it back up into my mouth and swallow it again... yes, EEWW!! But i bet the only reason i was able to swallow it that time was because it had already dissolve a bit so it's smaller... ha ha... eww...

hey, i don't have to take the wrong medicine to kill myself, i could just be choked by a pill to big to be swallowed... that homicidal doctor... lol, joking....

sigh... right.. since there's no more head splitting head ache, i better hit the books... Bye~

Spin, spin, spin

OK, i don't know what exactly to name this topic... so, just read and you'll know what I'm talking about.

First of all, i feel it's just so unfair...
Somebody have flawless skin, big beautiful eyes, pinkish cheeks, perfect body size, great attitude, amazing knowledge and they just seem to have everything.

Every times I see this type of people, I find my self comparing me to them. And what was the results? Obviously, they were better than me at almost everything.

I'd feel sad, depressed, slightly angry of myself... oh, yeah, don't forget, I'd get really, really jealous! This is just so upsetting... I'd think, 'Oh, how great it would have been if I am her...' or something like that.

But then, lately, I think I've developed a sense of self-confidence... Yes, now, whenever I think like that, I'd automatically reply that thought by saying: 'No, if I was that person, I'd never get the chance to be me, and I wouldn't be where I am today...' or 'But my friends like me this way, if I'm her, they might not like me...'

So I might not be miss perfect, so I might not be a genius, but I am me. I might not have accomplished something big... but at least I'm still able to accomplish a few small task in my daily life... and that's satisfying enough for me...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's a very sad feeling, you know, when we pay so much attention to them, when we really wanna get to know them, when we really, really like them, but they seem to just ignore us.

It's not their fault. They don't even know that we like them. They might not know that we exist. There's just so many of us, they don't necessarily have to pick us as their friend or something...

But still... It's terrible feeling. We give them our one hundred and one percent of attention, we do everything in our will to get them to know us... but they didn't even notice our effort, they simply just carry on with what duty they were given...

Maybe it's because we haven't spent enough time together, maybe they think they couldn't trust us cause we're just acquaintance....

They have the liberty to choose who they want to hang out with. They've got the right to say that they don't want to spent time with us. We can't argue with that, it's their choice. We'll just have to face the fact...

They have the right to choose, and so do we... If they don't like us, we'll have to move on, to find another person to befriends with....

We can't blame them... It's not their fault. It's not ours either. It's just simply how things work out...

But, if they didn't say they don't want to see us, I believe that means there's still chance to develop this relationship...

so I'm going to work hard, I'm going to try my best to get to know her better, I want her to notice me. I don't want to be known as just another junior, but Wan Hsin, who works hard and deserved what she earned...

and to everyone out there, work hard too, for your special someone