Spin, spin, spin

OK, i don't know what exactly to name this topic... so, just read and you'll know what I'm talking about.

First of all, i feel it's just so unfair...
Somebody have flawless skin, big beautiful eyes, pinkish cheeks, perfect body size, great attitude, amazing knowledge and they just seem to have everything.

Every times I see this type of people, I find my self comparing me to them. And what was the results? Obviously, they were better than me at almost everything.

I'd feel sad, depressed, slightly angry of myself... oh, yeah, don't forget, I'd get really, really jealous! This is just so upsetting... I'd think, 'Oh, how great it would have been if I am her...' or something like that.

But then, lately, I think I've developed a sense of self-confidence... Yes, now, whenever I think like that, I'd automatically reply that thought by saying: 'No, if I was that person, I'd never get the chance to be me, and I wouldn't be where I am today...' or 'But my friends like me this way, if I'm her, they might not like me...'

So I might not be miss perfect, so I might not be a genius, but I am me. I might not have accomplished something big... but at least I'm still able to accomplish a few small task in my daily life... and that's satisfying enough for me...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's a very sad feeling, you know, when we pay so much attention to them, when we really wanna get to know them, when we really, really like them, but they seem to just ignore us.

It's not their fault. They don't even know that we like them. They might not know that we exist. There's just so many of us, they don't necessarily have to pick us as their friend or something...

But still... It's terrible feeling. We give them our one hundred and one percent of attention, we do everything in our will to get them to know us... but they didn't even notice our effort, they simply just carry on with what duty they were given...

Maybe it's because we haven't spent enough time together, maybe they think they couldn't trust us cause we're just acquaintance....

They have the liberty to choose who they want to hang out with. They've got the right to say that they don't want to spent time with us. We can't argue with that, it's their choice. We'll just have to face the fact...

They have the right to choose, and so do we... If they don't like us, we'll have to move on, to find another person to befriends with....

We can't blame them... It's not their fault. It's not ours either. It's just simply how things work out...

But, if they didn't say they don't want to see us, I believe that means there's still chance to develop this relationship...

so I'm going to work hard, I'm going to try my best to get to know her better, I want her to notice me. I don't want to be known as just another junior, but Wan Hsin, who works hard and deserved what she earned...

and to everyone out there, work hard too, for your special someone